Dear Creative Child,
You scream in your maximum level of voice in an attempt to sing something. I did not stop you, but, said, such high voice was hurting my ears.
You sang songs with random sounds and words that you could think of. I did not stop you saying it was meaningless. Because, I believe, that something that seems to be senseless to one can make proper sense to another. Everything in the observable universe is relative. We cannot make absolute statements with our opinion. It might even happen that the song I sing to you could be senseless to you. Because, when seen from your perspective, you might not attribute meaning to the words nandalala or kaleeyamardhana or the like.
You wanted to wear three pony tails on your head. Upon my question, if you wanted two in the front and one at the back, you said, you wanted three - all in the front. Yes, perfectly fine. I did not stop you. I tied them so.
You were happy going to park as well as to school(in different instances) dressed so. Just because everyone around you wears two ponytails in a specific manner, it need not happen that you should also dress so.
You wore a large size beads mala(that is usually put on photo frame) for a walk downstairs. You liked it. I did not say no. You were pretending to be Hanuman. You were happy. I was happy that you could wear it without being afraid of what people around you would think.
You applied paint all over your face and wanted to go for a walk without cleaning up. I did not say no. You had a good time.Again, I was happy that you were not being afraid of what people around you would think.
You defined your own games with instructions(that were new to me) and I played as you said. We had a good time.
I like the fact that you create new sounds, new music, new games, new styles and wish to not pull you down in the name of society. I do not like comparing with what everyone around does. I do not use statements like, 'Oh! will there be anyone who dresses that way?', 'Oh! what will people think if you wear that?' etc.
Societal rules are created by a bunch of people who wish to think alike. It is okay to break the rules in order to continue being yourself. For, everyone is, for sure, unique, but not everyone follows their heart to be unique. Most people around are afraid of what the society thinks and how the society would react to our action. For you, I wish to keep all that at a safe distance. Because, creating new stuff is cool. Following rules need not always be cool.
All that I believe should be taken care of is, question like, is anyone hurt by my action?
There are times when children, a little older than you, did not make sense of the game you just described. Even your grandfather did not make sense of that game and denied to play with you unless you changed the method of play. Yes, in mutual play, you would have to respect the views of others. Likewise, your view also has to be respected. More than looking at what you wish to say, there were instances when people denied playing just because that game was already defined to be played in a specific manner. That is when, it takes an extra effort from your side to explain why you find the new method of playing interesting - go ahead and propose your idea. People may or may not like it, but, please do not stop creating new ways of play. There is no rule that, something that seems meaningful to one should be meaningful to all. Go ahead, take the plunge, create new things. When around people, respect all opinions.
I hope you will continue to create new music, new things, new styles without being afraid of what other people would think if you did so.
I know, sometimes, I seem to be laughing at you singing songs with random sounds you make, but, I am internally proud of what you actually create. You are creating sound with one of your senses. You are making a rhythm. You are giving it a tune.
You are CREATING. And, creation is something that needs to be looked up to. Do not have a second thought. Being different is not weird. It is special. Continue CREATING and continue being AWESOME.
Love,
Amma
Labels: ArtOfParenting, naturalLearning, respectthechild